


Indiscretion

by Viola_Laterra



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Awkward Dates, During Canon, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-19
Updated: 2019-02-19
Packaged: 2019-10-31 19:39:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17855711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Viola_Laterra/pseuds/Viola_Laterra
Summary: Zuko never wanted to go on a date in the first place.  It's been going horribly, as expected, except for the very end.





	Indiscretion

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, "The Tales of Ba Sing Se" was such a great episode; Iroh's story is particularly lovely. But I just loved those little moments for Zuko where he betrays feelings other than angst -- I've always meant to write out what I figured he was thinking at the time.  
> (Scene from the show; written February 16, 2019)

Zuko lay on his back, wide awake, listening to his uncle's increasingly deep breathing. He'd start snoring any minute.

The moonlight angled into the room through the window across from his bed, and he thought about how it had felt to fight Katara at the North Pole, when the moon had been fully on her side... and then how it had felt moments later when General Zhao had killed the Moon spirit, and suddenly his firebending had overwhelmed her.

That experience stood in such stark contrast to how he'd used it tonight. 

"Hmph," he huffed to himself, turning on his side impatiently, bitterly. He hadn't used his firebending in weeks. The risk of being exposed as Fire Nation while they were here, in the capital of the Earth Kingdom... it was too great.

So why had he done it? How could he have known it was safe? He'd let the moment carry him away from himself... a thing he should never let happen. Never again.

Now his uncle did begin snoring in earnest. As if he somehow knew his nephew was angry and incapable of sleep.

His uncle. Zuko snorted again. He knew Iroh had had the best of intentions. But a date? That was something other people did. Not Fire Nation Crown Princes who had to get their honor back, who were exiled and reviled.

He held onto that little bit of bitterness and anger like an ember in the hand, burning but also warming at the same time. He had to admit, he'd watched as people around him had gone about their lives, laughing, loving, grieving... doing what normal people did. Maybe he'd envied them.

Maybe that was why he'd gone along with it, gone on this ill-conceived date his uncle had maneuvered him into. And... he had to admit, he liked the girl. Jin was sweet, down-to-earth, and funny, and not simpering or obnoxious like some he'd seen. Girls weren't all one way or the other, he'd found, as they'd traveled. That had surprised him, but as he thought about it, of course it had. All he'd had to compare with was Azula, who was crazy, Mai, who was constantly depressed and displeased (but still somehow so attractive?), and Ty Lee, who was hopelessly optimistic.

But Jin was actually a lot of fun to talk to. He only wished he hadn't been so hopelessly awkward. But he'd just not known what to say, and every time he tried, the wrong thing had come out of his mouth.

When they'd stood at the fountain, and she'd wistfully said that it looked so much better when the flames were lit... he'd considered his actions, at least. He was proud of himself, that he had at least thought before acting. But it had just felt so right, to create that magic for her, both for her own sake... and a little bit because he wanted to share the moment with her. And it had seemed perfect... it didn't require words, so he couldn't mess it up. If there was anything he was sure of in that moment, it was that he could do the firebending just right -- that the necessary precision was well within his ability.

He was still in control, he thought, still thinking straight... so when he turned to her, and told her to open her eyes, voice even huskier than usual, and he saw the delight and disbelief in her face... as she looked around and saw the fires lit, the light dancing on the water in the fountain (which was quite lovely, in fact), he still felt on top of things. It still had the feeling of a calculated risk, one that was maybe worth it; Jin didn't seem like the kind of person who would turn them in to the authorities. She turned back to him and said, "What did you..." He just smiled at her, hoping she wouldn't push it, enjoying her apparent wonder: he'd done something right for her tonight, for a change. She looked around at the lanterns and the fountain again and sighed. 

But then she looked back at him, and there was a flicker of uncertainty in her face, and the nagging feeling at the back of his mind suddenly intensified. Like always, he thought morbidly, this is going to go badly. She'll figure out what I am... she'll report us...

And then... something unexpected happened. The flicker of uncertainty wavered for just a moment into fear -- she'd figured him out, because there was only one way to light fires that quickly -- but then it was utterly and miraculously gone. No fear, and instead a kind of determination and something Zuko had never seen in a girl's face before. He wasn't quite sure what it was, but she stepped close to him, and he figured he could guess. 

He panicked, shoved the tea coupon his uncle had given him in Jin's face, trying to stop something he wasn't sure he could stop, or that he wanted to stop.

But then she told him to close his eyes.

For some reason, that was enough. Utterly terrified, but strangely eager, he did as he was told by this girl, a lower-class Earth Kingdom citizen who ordinarily would have been beneath all semblance of his notice... and when her lips met his, he most certainly understood what the look in her eyes was, and immediately realized he felt it too: desire.

For only a moment, he leaned into her, eager, searching, ready... but then all his instincts closed in and he pulled back. No. This was not for him. It mattered not at all that he wanted it. In fact, having had a taste, he wanted it a little more terribly than he'd imagined. Even more important then, to remove temptation.

He turned away brusquely, tried ineffectually to respond to her concerned query, and left as fast as he could.

And when his uncle asked him how the date had gone... Zuko had just ignored him, stomped through the room, slammed the bedroom door. Acting out of the sour, bitter part of him. But then, just in a flash of admission, of deference to those moments of magic and possibility... he slid the door open a crack and added, a little guiltily, "It was nice."


End file.
